As an autistic person, I'm always scanning my environment for signs that I'm safe. I've always done this. Not just physical safety, but the safety I feel around the people I need to regularly interact with. I rely on the assumption that people are honest and are presenting an authentic version of themselves. If I feel safe and trust my space, I get to drop my guard and focus on what's important. But to do so, I rely on honesty and open communication from the people around me and I trust that my partner, or my employer or friend will speak to me. What happens when hints or subtleties are missed by an autistic person in our interpersonal or professional lives? What happens if someone ๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐ค๐ฃ๐๐ก๐ก๐ฎ ๐ค๐ข๐๐ฉ๐จ ๐๐ฃ๐๐ค ๐ค๐ง ๐๐จ ๐๐๐๐๐ฅ๐ฉ๐๐ซ๐ and us not having this knowledge can put us in an unsafe or dangerous situation? By the time an autistic person becomes aware, we are disadvantaged by: โข being blindsided by the new info, so we may shutdown or become dysregulated; โข taking longer to react, because overwhelm can keep us in a state of inaction as we scramble to process our emotions, made worse if we have alexithymia (difficulty in identifying feelings); โข the realisation that we are in too deep, which makes it harder to safely navigate our way out of the situation; โข an autistic meltdown which can make things far worse if the people surrounding us don't understand. ๐ง๐ต๐ถ๐ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ป ๐ถ๐บ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐๐๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐ต๐ฒ๐น๐ฝ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐น๐ถ๐ฒ๐๐ฒ๐ฑ. We know women experience higher rates of sexual violence. Autistic women are more vulnerable if they are unable to identify ulterior motives or dangerous situations.ย ย According to WHO, 1 in 3 women have been subjected to physical and/or sexual partner violence in their lifetime. The risk is higher for autistic woman if they are unable to ๐๐๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐๐ฎ an abusive situation or relationship, are isolated, and don't have a support system. To all the people harping on about "the increase in autism diagnoses today": โข women are historically underdiagnosed; โข women are known to mask, so autism presentation looks different; โข masking is exhausting and can lead to anxiety and depression,ย ย - more so if symptoms have been dismissed; โข hormones can make autistic challenges harder and disguise them, especially if the health care provider does not know what to look for (see point above); โข undiagnosed women can end up with additional mental health conditions (CPTSD) โ especially if they themselves don't know they are autistic; โข autistic challenges are even harder for women who have to deal with menstrual cycles, pregnancy or menopause; โข autistic challenges can make it harder to parent - especially if a woman is the primary caregiver. Knowing she is autistic can help a women: ๐ understand her needs better; ๐ identify her triggers better; ๐ get the supports needed to navigate life; ๐ identify unhealthy situations, so she can keep safe.
Not just physical safety, but the safety I feel around the people I need to regularly interact with.
I rely on the assumption that people are honest and are presenting an authentic version of themselves.
If I feel safe and trust my space, I get to drop my guard and focus on what's important.
But to do so, I rely on honesty and open communication from the people around me and I trust that my partner, or my employer or friend will speak to me.
What happens when hints or subtleties are missed by an autistic person in our interpersonal or professional lives?
What happens if someone ๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐ค๐ฃ๐๐ก๐ก๐ฎ ๐ค๐ข๐๐ฉ๐จ ๐๐ฃ๐๐ค ๐ค๐ง ๐๐จ ๐๐๐๐๐ฅ๐ฉ๐๐ซ๐ and us not having this knowledge can put us in an unsafe or dangerous situation?
By the time an autistic person becomes aware, we are disadvantaged by:
โข being blindsided by the new info, so we may shutdown or become dysregulated;
โข taking longer to react, because overwhelm can keep us in a state of inaction as we scramble to process our emotions, made worse if we have alexithymia (difficulty in identifying feelings);
โข the realisation that we are in too deep, which makes it harder to safely navigate our way out of the situation;
โข an autistic meltdown which can make things far worse if the people surrounding us don't understand. ๐ง๐ต๐ถ๐ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ป ๐ถ๐บ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐๐๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐ต๐ฒ๐น๐ฝ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐น๐ถ๐ฒ๐๐ฒ๐ฑ.
We know women experience higher rates of sexual violence.
Autistic women are more vulnerable if they are unable to identify ulterior motives or dangerous situations.ย ย According to WHO, 1 in 3 women have been subjected to physical and/or sexual partner violence in their lifetime.
The risk is higher for autistic woman if they are unable to ๐๐๐๐ฃ๐ฉ๐๐๐ฎ an abusive situation or relationship, are isolated, and don't have a support system.
To all the people harping on about "the increase in autism diagnoses today":
โข women are historically underdiagnosed;
โข women are known to mask, so autism presentation looks different;
โข masking is exhausting and can lead to anxiety and depression,ย ย - more so if symptoms have been dismissed;
โข hormones can make autistic challenges harder and disguise them, especially if the health care provider does not know what to look for (see point above);
โข undiagnosed women can end up with additional mental health conditions (CPTSD) โ especially if they themselves don't know they are autistic;
โข autistic challenges are even harder for women who have to deal with menstrual cycles, pregnancy or menopause;
โข autistic challenges can make it harder to parent - especially if a woman is the primary caregiver.
Knowing she is autistic can help a women:
๐ understand her needs better;
๐ identify her triggers better;
๐ get the supports needed to navigate life;
๐ identify unhealthy situations, so she can keep safe.